Walking Like A Girl

"I will show you!" the trainer said, and I handed the leash with Kenzo over to her. She made sure everybody was silent, and took off, wiggling in a way that would make Beyoncé faint, while talking to Kenzo in such a high-pitched voice it made me wonder if she might have been abducted by aliens.

Kenzo followed her immediately. The traitor. Although in his defense I have to note, he might have been as shocked as me. Maybe he just wanted to help her, in case something actually was wrong and we needed to call 911.

"You need to be funny and interesting". She handed the leash back to me. "Show me how funny you can be". Taking the leash into my hand, Kenzo was still trying to follow her, dragging me along, while she positioned herself in front of the group. She rewarded him with a treat and an adored smile on her face, "Aaaw ... Kenzo", she said, no doubt feeling honored by his affection.

I had a look around. A group of 15 women with their dogs were all looking at me. Where did all the men go, I pondered. When we started with Kenzo all the way back in puppy class there were both men and women, in equal numbers. Somewhere down the line, while we were climbing the ranks moving to the next level(s), they all seem to have disappeared.

Up to the challenge, I started to wiggle, did the high-pitched voice, I gave it the best I got. Kenzo was utterly shocked. He stopped in his tracks, like all his four paws suddenly were fixed in cement. The expression on his face revealed he was genuinely worried for what happened to me. "That's all you can do?", the trainer couldn't resist to underline, and the group giggled.

Although you might question the trainer's ability to project her canine positive reinforcement skills on to her male students, let's face it. There are far more women than men in dog training, simply because they are better at it. They connect better to dogs than men do. It was even researched, and proof was found why dogs gravitate more to women, simply due to the way they walk, among other things.

And on my earlier question, of where the men went. Well, they went to defense classes or other more "masculine" dog sports, or decided, to take care of the additional training themselves at home. Probably with a harder tone of voice as well. Neither are things I like to do.

I have never given up trying to walk like a girl, but it still is work in progress, even after all those years. Not that I ever found it difficult to be of interest to Kenzo and Viva, by wrestling, a game of tug, just acting silly, things that also worked like a charm.

But it all came back to me, now we have Tilde. I recognized quickly after we adopted her how much she gravitated towards my wife, and how I consistently needed to get down on my knees for her to approach me. So I am brushing off my feminine side once again, and I am back in training. When you spot a guy walking his dog, sort of in an odd way, with a very happy dog beside him, that'll be me and Tilde.